


Cardinal

by TheLittleMuse



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy, Star Wars: Phasma - Delilah S. Dawson
Genre: Cardinal is just tring to work some things out, Enemies to Friends, Gen, Post Phasma-Delilah S. Dawson, he'll get there
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-30
Updated: 2020-01-30
Packaged: 2021-02-27 03:47:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,708
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22480510
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheLittleMuse/pseuds/TheLittleMuse
Summary: Cardinal has left the First Order. That doesn't mean he's joined the Resistance.Does it?
Relationships: Cardinal & Vi Moradi
Kudos: 6





	Cardinal

Cardinal wasn’t really sure _why_ he stayed with Vi after he’d been released from the medbay. He wasn’t about to join her Resistance, but he couldn’t go back to the First Order, not just because the knowledge that he’d handed his children to Phasma crushed his soul, but he’s sure he’s already been wiped from the First Order’s history. Maybe Phasma and the Younger Hux have said he’s dead, a training accident, perhaps, nice and clean. Or maybe, just to stick the knife in, they’ve named him a traitor. As much as he wanted to scream at the thought, it’s unlikely. Vi had found no adverts for bounty, and it would be unwise at any rate. The children still looked up to him; their mentor rebelling could plant the seeds of rebellion in them.

He knew in some part he’s the prisoner now. The Resistance couldn’t afford to let him go wandering free, but he found he chafed against his bonds less than he thought he would. They hadn’t tortured him. The First Order would’ve if the tables were turned. He didn’t know if that showed weakness or, what … compassion? He’d told them little bits in exchange for handfuls of credits, little tidbits he’d felt able to part with, and they’d left it at that. Left him in Vi’s hands. Had they been so confident in their spy’s ability to turn him?

It scared him that he didn’t entirely disagree with their assessment.

Vi and him wandered round the galaxy together and Vi, spy and storyteller, showed him the First Order, she showed him families torn apart, people killed for getting in the way, cruelty, bloodshed. She stood back and let him see. She let him realise in his own time.

He remembered what she’d said to him, in that room, _Sorry, but you’re the only one here who’s not playing dirty. The First Order goes to planets, and they steal children, and they subsume resources_. 

_Steal children…_ He had never thought of it that way before, but it was true, wasn’t it? They took children, took their names, and turned them into monsters like Phasma to kill or die on command, because you weren’t a person. You were a number.

But he still believed it was just a rot, it could still be fixed. And then came Starkiller Base.

He was ashamed that the first thought through his head was, _How did I not know about this?_ Had he been slipping down the chain of command for longer than he realised?

Then he heard Vi’s screaming and he remembered Baako. Her brother, the dignitary, who, no doubt would have been flying back and forth to the Hosnian system for whatever dignitary duties he had to perform. From what Cardinal could remember of his recon Baako was stationed on Pantora, far away from the blast, but fear knew no logic. Cardinal watched as Vi sent message after message and tried to comprehend what had just happened.

Even if there were a few enemies in the Hosnian System, which he knew was the home of the hated Republic, the uncountable amount of innocent lives lost was beyond comprehension. Why would the First Order do such a thing?

 _Fear_ , said Brendol’s voice, _if they fear you, they will not fight_. That had been one of his little sayings, one of the reasons both the Empire and the First Order wore the stormtrooper armour. It invoked fear and, in theory, stopped a fight before it began. Cardinal had thought it a sound way to save bloodshed.

This was not saving bloodshed.

From everything he had learnt about Brendol, from what he had done to Parnassos as he had left, Cardinal wondered if he wouldn’t have approved of the Starkiller. Maybe he had even seen the first plans.

He felt sick and lost and alone.

He wondered how anyone could obey such an order, how hundreds and hundreds of stormtroopers had not once questioned what they were about to do, and he knew the answer; because he had trained them. He had programmed them perfectly. They never disobeyed orders; the ones that showed even the slightest noncompliance disappeared.

He was sick then. He had taken children and created monsters. _Stolen_ children. That was the word Vi had used. _Stolen_. He knew it was true. Vi had shown him families and Cardinal had tried to recognise faces in their desperate parents, sisters and brothers. Sometimes he thought he did and that was worse.

All this time Vi had been showing him, _this_ is why we fight. He finally understood.

Cardinal moved over to Vi. Getting any message through was difficult, lines were down and channels were filled with the same desperate messages that Vi was sending. Still, she tried over and over again. He put a hand on her shoulder. Physical comfort was new to him. His children lived and grew so close to each that touches were as much a way to communicate as words, _especially_ when their words were closely monitored. The other officers might have dalliances with each other or think nothing of taking leave planetside for … whatever, but he never could. He had been assigned his own room early on and that had kept him apart. He felt safest inside his suit. _Just like Phasma_ , he thought bitterly.

Vi touched his hand. His _bare_ hand. He didn’t tell her it was going to be okay, he hadn’t been trained to lie, or at least, he had only been trained to tell things he thought were true. Whether they were lies or not was subjective. It all depended on your point of view.

The next few weeks were hell. When they eventually met back up with (what was left of) the Resistance Vi smiled for the first time since Starkiller and Cardinal realised he had missed her wry half-smile. He thought about running but he realised, for the hundredth time, that it was too late to panic about attachment.

Vi chatted to her Resistance friends and Cardinal stood like a spare part. He missed his helmet more than ever, he was hyper-aware of his facial expressions, but he realised a helmet might make him stand out even more here.

Vi turned back to him, her smile even wider, “I have someone to meet you,” she said.

“To meet … me?”

She nodded, “He’s called Finn. But you might know him as FN-2187.”

FN-2187. It took him a moment, but he remembered. He’d been worried about FN-2187, the boy was talented, but an outcast. He’d been worried Phasma would eat him up and spit him out.

A man stood before him, strong and tall, with brave, defiant eyes. His muscles were tensed, automatically coming to attention before a superior officer.

“Tell me why,” Cardinal said softly.

“My first mission, my first _real_ mission, they wanted us to gun down some villagers to, I don’t know, cover their tracks I suppose, and I couldn’t do it. So I ran,” said Finn.

Cardinal nodded, “I understand. That wasn’t what I trained you for. I thought…” he trailed off. Learning that the First Order was something completely different to what he had been led to believe all his life had been the most difficult, damaging thing he’d ever experienced, was still experiencing.

“It was everything, really. I had to run,” said Finn.

“Phasma?” asked Cardinal

“Yeah, Phasma. But, no offence sir, I mean _everything_. They took me from my family and gave me a number. A _number_. It took me a long time to realise that I shouldn’t be just a number. A name shouldn’t be something you earn; it should be something you have because I’m a person, not just a cog. You are too. A person, I mean. Can you remember your name before the First Order?”

“Archex.”

Finn’s eyes misted over and he said, “I can’t. I can’t remember my name or my family. But I’m Finn now and I have friends and the Resistance is my family.” He gave Cardinal a hard stare, the type he never would’ve gotten away with if he had still been a stormtrooper. “You’re not letting yourself see. You can be part of this too,” he softened slightly, “You were the only good one in the whole mess, sir. It would be a shame if you left.”

Cardinal felt a little breathless and it took a few moments before he could speak, “I won’t deny what the First Order did to you FN – Finn, but for me – for me, it was a saviour. Brendol Hux rescued me from my existence on Jakku-”

To Cardinal’s surprise Finn burst out laughing, “Jakku,” gasped Finn. “Of course it was Jakku. I can understand wanting to leave. My best friend comes from Jakku and she got out of there,” he sobered. “The village that we were ordered to slaughter was on Jakku. Maybe it was your old home, I don’t know.”

Something cold settled in Cardinal’s chest. It was impossible that they were the same village and it had been a long time since he had called that place home, but a boy named Archex cried in fear nonetheless. “Was it Phasma?”

“Phasma was our Commanding Officer, but the order came from Kylo Ren. The First Order doesn’t care, sir. The higher-ups never cared. The First Order was never about making things better, it was about power,” Finn gave a deep sigh. “I’m not the guy to persuade you to fight for a cause. If you want to leave I understand that, believe me, I do. My first instinct was to run and not look back. But I just want you to understand what the First Order is and if you want friends that won’t turn on you just rise up that ladder,” he shrugged, “this is the place.”

Cardinal looked around at the Base. It had all the trappings of a military base with its cobbled together equipment and ill-fitting, second-hand uniforms. Cardinal kept noticing the way people would pause as they passed one another to exchange one or two words, or even just a look that meant … something. He should have hated it except for the fact that he didn’t.

“Ok,” he said. “Ok.”

Behind him Vi beamed.


End file.
